Q's Gift To Riker
Chapters 3-4
Chapter 3
"Q, get back here!" Q the female roarred.
Q had been running through space and he pause mid-movement in his running. "Must I?" he asked in a whine.
"Yes, or I'll zap you to Hell and back."
"Ah, being in Hell would be so much more fun than
this." he said in an impish voice.
"Q!"
"Yes, dear?" trying to butter her up.
"Don't even try." she grinned an evil grin. "Now, Q, you have gotten three people 
pregnant. Two female and only one of them should be pregnant by you. The other is a human male, who should not be."
"Oh, isn't it wonderful?" Q said as though it was
supposed to be a good thing.
"Q, I can still spread your atoms across the Universe for
the other female you got pregnant." she threatened.
"But then, I would have to take care of the human male
myself and that would be an abhorance." she cringed.
"But you won't." he stated with a smile.
"At least not until you put that human baby back in it's
mother's womb."
"Oh, he's not already in his mother's womb?" he
quipped. "I thought Mr. Troi was the mother."
"Q!"
"But dear, Will Troi is daff this way." Q said.
"He's just so much fun to watch!"
"Q! I won't say it again!"
"OK, OK, but may I have a little fun with him first?" he asked making puppy dog eyes at his wife.
"Oh, alright." she conceeded. "You may have a
little more fun with the human male, but only for a little while. And then, you put that child back and then your mine to spread across the Universe!"
Q gulped. Then the two Qs watched the Rikers, unseen, through
their window. They observed the humans like they were rats in a science experiment.
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Deanna guided her stunned husband into their quarters. He kept
repeating that he was pregnant and she really wished he would
stop. The problem was, he was in too much shock to yell at him
about it.
"Deanna, I'm pregnant. Not crippled." he said.
"Oh, gods! I can't believe I said that!"
"Yes, dear. You do go on." she said.
With that and Deanna's help, he sat down on the couch and starred out into space. Deanna was at a loss on how to help her husband.
Just then Q pops in and Deanna becomes a mother lioness again.
"Put my baby back where he belongs, Q!" she growled.
"Oh, I will. In time." Q said as if it were no big
deal.
"Now!" she roarred.
"Q, I'm pregnant." Will informed.
"So you keep saying. Well, it's a boy if that helps
any." Q teased.
"Q!" they both roarred.
"OK, but only after he does something for me."
"And what might that be?" Deanna asked.
"I'm pregnant, Q!" Will shouted. "I don't want to carry this baby! That's my wife's job!"
"Yeah, yeah. So you say." Q replied.
"Q!" Will finally came out of his shock and tried to go for Q's juggler. Deanna tried to hold him back, but he yanked free.
"Will, think of the baby!" she pleaded.
Q sat Will back on the couch gently with his powers. Will floated all the way until he softly landed on his behind.
"Trust me." Q said with an edge of anger. "I was being nice. I could have sat you down hard for that
attempt."
"Will, you must calm down, for the baby's sake." Deanna informed him.
"It's not right for a man to be pregnant." he said
almost whining. "At least not a human male."
"OK." Q began. "I'll put Junior back in his
mother's womb with his sister, if you do me one favour. Although it's beyond me why you would want your children so crowded. Besides, I do think you make a good mom, Mr. Troi."
Deanna frowned and Will was feeling very irrate still. All Will said was, "All I want is to not be pregnant anymore."
"I can see why!" Q exclaimed. "You're even more
bitchy than pregnant females. And your mood swings!
Unbelievable!"
Deanna rolled her eyes and took control again of the situation, because she sensed Will was not capable at this time.
"So, what do you want from us?" she asked.
"To keep my wife from scattering my molecules all over the Universe."
"And why would she do that?" as if she did not know the answer already.
"OK, you want to play that way, do you?" Q said
indignantly. "I'll answer your question only because Mr.
Troi does not know all that's going on due to his
condition." Q then pauses as though he hated to confess.
"I got another Q pregnant."
"Oh, I feel sorry for him." Riker said.
"Don't be silly you twit! I'm not gay! She was female!" Q recoiled.
"Could have fooled me!" Riker continued.
Q leanned in closed and threaten into Riker's ear. "You
know, Mr. Troi, I could say forget it and zap both you and your baby out into space. Think of it! Zero-G and zero oxygen. How long do you think you two would last?"
"Q! Don't even threaten my husband like that!" Deanna growled.
"Oh, I'm sorry. Are you addressing me?" Q responded.
"I could do the same with you, but you are just too pretty for that. Especially when you're angry."
"I do have one question, Q." Will stated.
"Oh, do tell me it's something I can zap you out into space for!" Q said.
Chapter 4
Will sits
starring at Q, then he finally asks, "And Mrs. Q is not at all upset that you got me pregnant?"
Q almost laughs, but then remembers Mrs. Q's wrath."Actually, she is."
"Amazing!" Will retorts.
"But until I put Junior back where he belongs, I'm
safe."
"Oh, so I'm your bargining chip?" Will asked with lots of resentment.
"Well, in a word, yes."
Will growls and starts to attack, but Q holds his hand up and
suspends Will in mid-air, then pins him back on the couch again. Only this time, he was not quite so gentle.
"So," Deanna starts. "We have to help you, since Admirals Janeway and Picard would not?"
"Precisely." Q smiles. "And in the meantime, Mr. Troi gets to enjoy the pleasures of Fatherhood."
"I have to sleep like this, all night?" Will said with alarm.
"Or should I say, Motherhood." Q restated looking at
Will, who was starring out into space again.
"So," Deanna began. "What do you expect us mere
mortals to do? After all she is a Q, like yourself. All powerful, all knowing and omnipotent."
"You're smart. I think." Q remarked. "Figure it
out yourselves." And then he blinked out of the room.
"I have to spend all night like this." Will whimperred.
Deanna sympathized, but said, "Look on the bright side. It could be the whole ten months."
"Oh, you're really encouraging." Will remarked. Then he just sat there. Suddenly he realized he had a strong craving, for all things, chocolate.
"Deanna."
"Yes, Imzadi."
"I have this very strong craving for" he pauses.
"Chocolate."
Deanna chuckled and said, "I'll make us my specialty."
"Chocolate, chocolate chip ice cream with hot fudge and
chocolate sprinkles?"
"Yes." she smiled with a nod and set off to the
replicator.
"Sounds just the thing to hit the spot." he said after her with a smile.
Within minutes she was back with the dessert for four in two
bowls. Will accepted one bowl and they both ate the concoction
without any comments from Will. When they were finished Will felt exhausted.
"I am so exhausted." Will told Deanna. "Do you
really think I can sleep?"
"Well," Deanna started to tell him the honest truth,
but then decided against it and just said, "Possibly."
"Well, I'm ready for bed." Will tried to get up, but
then he fell right back down. So he tried another way and
another. Finally, he placed one hand on the back of the couch and the other on his back to support it. Deanna smiled. It was all she could do to keep from laughing out loud. He got up with his belly leading. Then he waddled to the bedroom.
He tried to lay straight back then suddenly caught himself. He
felt like he was going to fall down that way. He tried several
other ways to lie down, then he finally decided to lie down
sideways.
"Geez!" he exclaimed. "All this just to get
comfortable! I really do hope this does not last long!"
Deanna just giggled.
"Oh, yeah!" he said. "You can laugh about it, but this is hardly funny for a man!"